Autism

I got a phone call this week. It's like many others I have had in the past, but this one was a little different because of who it came from. I have dreaded it, but suspected for a while now that I would be getting it. This was the first one from a close family member.
My sister-in-law called and told me she and her sons teachers were pretty sure her son is on the spectrum. He has an appointment on the 18th with a specialist, they expect a diagnosis then. She is stressed to say the least, and in the stage we all go through when we realize that our children will not grow up the way we once thought they would.
We had a very good and candid conversation. She asked me questions. Several of the usual questions including one of my favorites and the one I get asked the most... "How do you deal with it?"
That's a good question. How do I deal with the child? How do I deal with the disorder? How do I deal with the guilt? How do I deal with the schools? How do I deal with the behaviors? How do I deal with the emotions (both mine and theirs)? What exactly is "it"?
I am very fortunate. The three of my sons who are on the spectrum are all on the more mild side. They have their issues, and I have to admit I worry about them constantly, but they are happy boys. None of them have terribly violent or destructive behaviors. They are awkward but all enjoy being social. We encourage them to learn and do things that "normal" kids do, but often find we wish we could expose them to things but worry how they would deal with the exposure. We also constantly wonder what the future holds for them.
We love watching their progression. When breakthroughs come we celebrate. When breakdowns come we try to have patience. We pray. We wish. We hope. But most importantly...we love.
They are after all children. Children of ours. And children of God.
So, how do I deal with it?
I just do my best.